Happy New Year: CSN $20 Gift Certificate Giveaway!! -CLOSED-

Just in time the for the New Year, I present…..

MY FIRST EVER GIVEAWAY!!!!!

The wonderful and fabulous CSN Store is sponsoring this giveaway for a $20 Gift Certificate to use at one of their 200+ online stores! These stores are amazing and you can find whatever you need there be it Health and Fitness Equipment, stuff for babies and kids, or modern dining furniture!

I have a tendency (as I am sure most of you do as well) of planning out my dream house decor in my head and taking little mental pictures of what I want it to look like. The first on my list, is to redo my bedroom and get a new bedding set. Its too hard to decide on one bedding set since CSN has so many great choices but I do love this one!

Also, if I had the space, I would love to be able to finally decorate Elijah’s room. I saw this bedding and think it’s so cute! I love the little owls. What do you think??

And Adam and I always talk about how we want to grow fresh herbs one day for cooking. I saw these little herb pots and thought they would be awesome to have in the kitchen.

Anyways, these are just a few things that I like at the CSN Stores.

What about what you like??

To enter to win the $20 Gift Certificate, browse the CSN website and then leave a comment on this post telling me what you would use the $20 for {and/or} about one of your New Year’s Resolutions. (Please keep in the mind that the $20 does not cover international fees.)

You have until midnight, January 5th to enter and I will announce the winner on Thursday, January 6th.

I think this is a great way to start the New Year off right! And a great way to meet some new friends that may have been too shy before. (I see the little visitor ticker showing people from Missouri, Virgina, California and more. You are welcome to enter too!)

I hope you win!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

BOO-YA!!!

One B+ and One A (in the hardest and best class I have EVER taken at BYU, thank you very much!!) for Megan

One B+ and Five A’s for Adam

HECK YEAH!!!

it may not be perfect, straight A’s…. but I think it’s amazing nonetheless!

We’re GENIUSES!!

I’m pretty sure I told Adam I was going to quit school all the way up until a couple of weeks before school ended. Not only were my classes (or really the one class… did you read the fine print above) a lot of work, but I was extremely sleep deprived and worn out from trying to keep other people alive. (Adam’s included because well… let’s be honest. He would be nothing without me :-))

But I did it!!

And I did it with flying colors!

I’m so proud of me and Adam for sticking with it even when this semester felt like it was going to kick our butts hard.

 

 

Now on to next semester….. let’s hope I have a repeat of this post in April!

LOL!!

these pictures of Mr. E. make me literally {laugh out loud}

so I want to share.

I LOVE this kid!!

until next year…

 

“Christmas is over, Elijah.” –Adam

but boy was it fun!

happy Christmas to me!!

Best Christmas Present: Wii Fit telling me I would be better and healthier if I gained 20 pounds.

Healthier if I gain weight?!?!?!

Thank you Wii Fit for giving me a boost in the body image department!! I don’t know if I fully believe you but I’ll take it.

In your face WIC people for calling me fat!! I still hate you guys for that, by the way.

we believe

in…

Kris Kringle

St. Nicholas

Father Christmas

Swiety Mikolaj

Pere Noel

Babbo Natale

Santa Claus!

 

Merry Christmas

love, Elijah

hello high hopes, don’t mind if i crush you

someday, maybe i’ll tell you about the biggest rollercoaster weekend of my entire life

and how we spend 19 hours in the car and still ended up back in Provo

and how i’m pretty sure Adam has never seen me cry so hard/be so upset

and how I’ve never seen Elijah have so much energy after being trapped in his car seat for extended periods of time

 

but right now, i’m doing my best to block out the last couple of days in my mind

i’ve learned to be okay with living in denial for the time being

i’m sure soon i will look back at this and laugh and realize there was a lesson to be learned…

 

 

it will probably not be soon.

 

my boy, Fido

  

now that Mr. man is a master crawler, he follows me around all day.

literally. all day.

i go to the back room, you hear a little patter of hands and knees moving across the kitchen floor while he jabbers “Na na na na!! na!! da da da tttttsss na na!”

i go to the bathroom and he crawls over banging on the door or comes in and starts playing with the toilet paper.

i go to the bedroom, Eli is right behind me and sits near my feet playing with shoes while i fold clothes.

doing dishes is the trickiest because he comes over and sits next to me/plays with the dustbin/tries to stand up using my legs and runs the risk of falling hard on the kitchen tile linoleum

if you choose to eat around him, he will crawl as fast as his little chubby knees can go and whines/begs for a bite.

(i also may/may not stay in pajamas all day. even after my shower. i’m so classy.)

“This is not food for babies.”

“Na na na na!!!! (bursts out in tears)”

if crumbs drop on the floor, Eli will pick it up for you (with his mouth)

yep. i have my own little puppy dog to follow me around.

it gets rather ridiculous at times… like when i just want to go to the bathroom…

but most times, me and Adam are cracking up hard over his insistency and determination to be by my side constantly

oh, my sweet little pet!

note:  in no way do i treat my child like an actual dog. he is a human, this i know and treat him as a child of God. promise. :-)

music to my ears!

i love free things

love love love

free free freeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!

(said like Oprah when she gives away stuff)

as many other people have posted already, Shutterfly is giving 50 free Christmas cards!

and since we’re poor, starving college students, of course i jumped at the opportunity to shamelessly promote their website on my blog so i can send out brag photos of Mr. E.

i’m thinking this lovely Christmas card which will highlight E’s chubbiness perfectly

i also love these desk calendars to give to my parents. just so they are constantly reminded of 3 good reasons to move back to the states (babies growing, chubby babies you can’t help but squish, and of course me!)

 

and who doesn’t love these adorable Holiday cards?

hopefully i can get a sweet picture of Eli like that. it would be perfect!

 

i {honestly} do love Shutterfly so i’m really excited about this giveaway. i have made photo books with them before and they always turn out amazing. so you should definitely go check them out and order your Christmas cards through them.

and if you like freeeeeeee, go here and sign up!

but hurry. sign up ends tomorrow so don’t miss out!

what’s it going to hurt

I figure since I’m already revealing what an awesome parent I am, it wouldn’t hurt to share this extra footage.

We think it’s hilarious.

 Is that totally horrible of us??

Probably.

But I’m sure other parents have videos just like this and think it is equally as hilarious.

Kids are for enjoyment right??

I’m sure that’s totally wrong.

But whatever. Enjoy!!

Adam scaring Elijah from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

you deserve an explanation

Tuesday 3:14pm

BYU Police officer shows up at our door

“We got a 911 call. Is everything okay?”

Our faces are totally shocked. Adam is holding Elijah when he opened the door.

“Well…. he was playing with my wife’s cell phone earlier. He might’ve accidentally called….”

I check my phone. The numbers “08” were dialed and it was titled SOS.

Apparently, calling nonsensical numbers equals a distress call.

That could be a good thing if you are bound/gagged/dying and you can only dial 2 numbers.

But it is not a good thing when babies like phones.

I swore I locked the keypad. But either I really didn’t (which I swear I did) or little E really maneuvered the keys well and unlocked it.

Which honestly wouldn’t surprise me. He typed this on my computer once:

+JUTBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBVP;006Ezv0063zzasdfgbl?/ z,;LL;,AAAAAAAD;=”:
{{“ RETYHUJK./!  /:

Notice the use of the exclamation mark and other symbols that need two keys pressed at once. And he successfully made an “ambiguous shrug” emoticon face.

He’s a genius I tell you.

The officer honestly didn’t seemed bothered by it at all. He showed up with his hands in his pocket and a nonchalant look on his face like he was bored and this was just something to pass the time during the nonexistent blizzard.

Here’s the catch though. Elijah called SOS at 2:37pm. The cop showed up 37 minutes later.

No exaggeration!

What if there was an emergency??? I’m a little nervous what would happen if I got electrocuted or had a seizure and was lying on the floor for 37 minutes until someone showed up…

But anyways, that was the excitement around our house on Tuesday!

That and Elijah falling off the bed… Yes. We have been nominated for Parents of the Year awards and I’m pretty sure we are going to win

/:

a week of firsts

Elijah rolled himself up in the blanket and thought it was so funny

First time Elijah put his head under the faucet in the bath. It totally freaked him out then he went back for more.

First time Elijah called 911 and we had a cop show up at our door

First (and second time…) Elijah fell off the bed (Hi, we’re horrible parents!)

First time {since I’ve been here} BYU has cancelled school for a snowstorm (that didn’t happen….The Storm of the Century/2K-ten was a bust)

First time Elijah nursed after a month hiatus (Mama was very very happy! until he decided to stop again…)

First time I cooked a Thanksgiving dinner from scratch (minus the pie crust…more on that later)

All in all, it has been a crazy/fun/happy/heartbreaking/stressful/awesome week!

we’re in trouble now

Elijah learned how to pull himself up yesterday.

he looked at us and smiled like it was no big deal.

NO BIG DEAL?!?!

we’re in biiiiiiig trouble now

soon he’ll be climbing on things…. walking…. getting into things he shouldn’t

what happened to just being a blob of a baby that used to just lay there?

he’s only 7 months!

i love my big fat baby

but boy do i miss my little scrawny dependent newborn

standing up from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

(he started trying to stand up while I was doing homework so I grabbed the camera real fast to video tape him. which is why this is kind of all over the place…)

this may be embarrassing....

but to me, it's hilarious/awesome/fantastic/andilovelovelove

two fat boys crying. and of course, any good parent would also take video.

Elijah and Dane crying from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

(this is Dane and Elijah in California this last August. Dane is Adam's sister's baby. He's a week older than Elijah)

mover and shaker

did I tell you guys Elijah officially crawls now???

as of right now, we love it more than hate it. but I know soon he’ll start getting into things and we’ll probably learn to miss how he used to sit immobile in his crib and sleep allllll day long.

oh wait. we actually do miss the sleeping all day long part.

but Eli actually plays by himself soooo much better now that you can actually start getting things done more than 3 minutes at a time.

so we {love.love.love.}

and I even think it’s endearing when he finds me in the kitchen doing dishes and [crawls/whines over to me and sits at my feet looking up at me with puppy dog eyes until I pick him up.]

a puppy = very, perfect description of Elijah (in more ways than one)

maybe some day I’ll write a blog post about that to show you the similarities.

but for now, enjoy this cute video.

Elijah crawling from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

p.s.

there a lot of videos i posted to Vimeo (for grandmas to see more easily on the blog) but have not posted on the blog yet. so if you have already looked through them, I apologize that you may get double doses.

but they are still so stinkin cute so of course you want to see more, right?

don’t let the smile fool you….

i had no idea what i was in for when i got ready for my last year of college with a new baby.

no.idea.

at i’m not even full-time. i have a whole new respect for those girls who are taking 12 credits {and more!!} after having a baby while their husbands are also in school.

i thought it would be easy.

two classes

two hours/three days a week

piece of cake.

yeah right. going to class is the easy part.

[minus today when elijah had two major meltdowns before i could go to either class]

there were so many times i told adam i wanted to quit.

what is my major really good for anyways?? [human development?? i’m still wondering what marketable skill i’ll really have after all of this… instead of left with time lost/major debt]

papers, tests, readings, syntheses….

+

baby tugging at your pants whining

+

teething??

+

husband gone most of the day then comes home to do his own {papers, tests, readings…}

+

all the other stuff a wife is supposed to do

+

the stresses of the other wife-y things not getting done

=

A LOT OF WORK!

i can’t wait until this year is over.

i absolutely cannot wait!

but even more, i can’t wait until i can look back on this time and say:

“I DID IT!”

cause adam is right.

i’m going to be proud of my degree [marketable skill or not]. and i’m always going to be proud of having my little chunker.

and i’m going to be proud that even during such a horrendously stressed out time, i got to spend it with my little babe and get to know each other.

{even if i do want to run away sometimes….}

doesn’t this just melt your heart?

View Full Album

it melts mine.

lullabyes from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

a few of my favorite things

 

• the way Eli scrunches his nose when he smiles his {big} smile
• when Eli raises his eyebrows when he looks at you
• how he’s learned the sounds “DDD” and “NNN” and all day says “duhdada nerner nana buboo dader” and sounds like the Swedish Chef
• Eli’s {army/inch worm crawl} that has just recently turned into a more synchronized movement that quickly gets him stuck under the table
• when he waves his arms & legs ferociously when I come home from school with a huge grin on his face
• his little Mowgli half smile
• the way he slowly {rubs my face and arm} as he falls asleep (then digs his nails in my nose… not a favorite)
• the way he closes his eyes, holds my face {and smiles} as I kiss his cheeks
• how he crawls to me and scratches at my legs when he wants me
• or how he crawls on top of me in the morning to get my attention and kisses. sweetest wake-up call (even if it may be earlier than I’d like…)
• his undeniable love for his mama and papa. and MAN, we {sure dang} love him back

i got it from my mama

right????

he’s totally my baby

all this talk about him looking just like Adam… come on! he’s like his mama through and through (and of course a little bit of Adam… but the smile’s all mine!)

Happy Halloween

 

-love, a chubby skeleton

(oxymoron??)

oohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my gosh

dear life,

i’m going to be honest. i’m not your biggest fan at the moment. the time seems distant when i will be on better terms with you again (i.e. the summer when i’m done with having to balance school with family). as of now though, you have made me mad too many times and i want to take a break from you. so please excuse me while i go curl up in the corner in fetal position and sob. (Elijah is sleeping finally so this is acceptable mom behavior). and please allow my blogging hiatus to continue until i {feel joyous} enough to write again.

your not so biggest fan,

the girl in the the corner

love the babe

thank you all for that {much needed} support and love

I feel a lot better than before and although I still get kind of down, I remember your sweet words of encouragement and know that I am truly blessed

my life isn't perfect but I can choose to be perfectly happy with it

and this little guy does wonders to a unhappy heart.

he makes everything so {worthwhile}

little giggles from Megan Robinson on Vimeo.

mom jeans

(please pay no attention to my horrible legs in this picture and go straight from the skirt to the shoes)

on Sunday, I had first decided to wear this fabulous skirt paired with my fabulous {very tall} heels.

i *absolutely loved the look

then i went to hold Elijah while Adam got ready….

then got the baby ready…

then got the baby bag ready…

changed one more diaper…

and i couldn’t do it

i felt far from fabulous

and even more, i felt *too inappropriate to wear such things while having a child. i told Adam that if i was still in a single’s ward, i would have no reservations wearing this to church

but i was married now. and more importantly, i was a mom

moms can’t wear such things.

i felt like i was trying too hard to look {hip and single} again when i was past my time

do i sound old and depressed??

cause i’m pretty sure i was/am

then late tonight, as i was watching tbs and the *edited version of sex and the city i heard these two quotes:

“you don’t have to lose yourself to have a kid”

“one day you’ll wake up and not know where you went”

i had been thinking about this concept before this episode, mind you, and have truly felt that way before

can i not be fun, crazy, silly, fashionable anymore because i’m married and have a baby?

am i not the same person i once was?

not that i was so great before, but i do feel a distinct change in how i act. why am i so afraid? what do i have to lose? am i that scared of getting judged? [and i don’t just mean for how i dress, i just mean doing anything i once did before marriage and baby]

i don’t really know the answers to these questions. and i’m sure there will be a part of me that still struggles with this from time to time.

i always make comparisons. it’s unhealthy and stupid and i know it. but it’s true. and from these comparisons i look at others and think how wonderful they seem or how great their life must be or how much more fun they are having than me.

and they can wear {and do} whatever they want.

why are they so different than me? or at least why DO I THINK they are so different than me? (besides the fact that i have a baby…)

another question i’m not sure i can answer yet.

 

BUT THIS IS MY PLEDGE:

i am going to try {my hardest} to let go, give in, and throw out the second guesses out. i may not fully be able to stop comparing… but i can at least try to just be happy WITH ME. with who i am, with who i’ve become, and who i want to be. i can still be fun and crazy. i can still have dance parties and wear heels! (right? can i?)

i think i can.

this is my pledge: to get out of my rut and into the sunlight.

 

disclaimer: these are my thoughts only about myself only. if i saw a mother wearing really tall high heels i would not think that’s inappropriate. i would actually be jealous she had the confidence for it… so don’t think i’m saying this about all mothers

any similarities??

 

or is it just me hoping that he looks a teensy-bit like his mama???

is it normal to be jealous that everyone says he looks like Adam?

productivity.

today, Elijah took a suuuuuuper long nap. he even woke up at one point and whined a little but then just went back to sleep.

i was/am shocked.

but can you guess what i did instead of tackling my suuuuuuper long to-do list and my essay due on friday???

  

ate a whole package of fun-dip by myself while watching iCarly. 

 

does any part of that sentence surprise you?

cause let’s be honest, it probably shouldn’t.

 

 

now that i’m full of processed sugar, maybe i should go actually get some things done….

blessings from heaven

when Elijah was first born, we received a lot of free sample cans of formula. at the time, i was thinking it was kind of a waste because my baby was going to be solely breastfed

then reality hit me and as much i really wanted him to only have breast milk, it wasn’t always feasible when i had a class to take and couldn’t always make it home in time for a feeding or was up the whole night before with him and didn’t get a chance to pump.

the formula has also been a huge blessing for the road trips we have taken when we couldn’t pull over and his most recent week-long nursing strike.

although i feel {extremely guilty} giving him formula (especially when i hear other mothers talk about how their babies have never had formula in their life. they will probably have a higher IQ i guess…) we have come to the realization that now we are down to our last container of the 3 that we received.

and guess what people, formula is freaking expensive.

although Elijah mainly nurses, the knowledge of our emergency supply diminishing is troubling. we were dreading the day that we had to actually fork over the money to pay for formula for those {just in case} situations.

but. HALLELUJAH!

i thought our time for free samples was over.

but it’s not.

the gods of free stuff have blessed us again and a little surprise awaited us in our mailbox today.

we are seriously so blessed.

there are a lot of things that have been pressing on my mind lately and much of it having to do with living and finances. it is a stressful time for us and at times i feel very overwhelmed with what lay ahead of us. but i know this simple act of a free box of formula has taught me that the Lord is really watching out for us. He knows our fears and our hopes.

who knew a little can of formula would really make me feel this way?? i guess this is my new life now.

{and i love it.}

phew.

{This is how I feel.}

it’s only the second week of school.

boo.

i’ve{almost}decided to quit more than once.

having a baby while in school is a lot harder than i thought it would be. i have so much more respect for women who have accomplished such a task.

please tell me how you did it?!?!

p.s. I GOT MY COMPUTER BACK!! wa-cha!!

under construction

while I {not so patiently} wait for my computer to get fixed and come back to me, please accept my deepest apologies for neglecting my blog for a month.

babies+sharing a computer+school starting
=
no chance

again, I apologize.

but please enjoy the picture of Elijah eating his first rice cereal.
he's a fatty.

look at that face!
can you tell he looooooves to eat?

{we super like him.}

rolly-polly

it’s funny how the littlest things become the biggest milestones

this is actually Eli’s 2nd time rolling over. Adam put him down on his stomach on the play mat earlier while he was working on an essay. he started squawking a bit but nothing like crazy crying so we were trying to let him learn how to be by himself (he looooooves attention and wants you looking at him all the time or he gets angry). all of a sudden he stopped and Adam looked down at him and he was on his back. Elijah looked like he was in shock with what just happened and Adam said, “Um, he just rolled over…”

so like any good parents we grabbed our camera and tried to get him to do it again. at that point, he just laid there quietly for a while like he was exhausted from rolling over the first time. but eventually he got into position again and we videotaped it.

i love it!

and i love him!

and it does kind of make me a teensy-bit sad to realize he’s already growing up so fast….

what I thought I knew

When I was pregnant and preparing to be a new mother, I thought I had it all figured out. I made lists and rules in my head that I swore I would abide by. These were my top 5:

• my baby would never sleep in our bed
• I would practice babywearing religiously
• my baby would never drink formula unless it was absolutely necessary
• me and Adam would get the baby right when he starts making hunger cues so he never cried (Adam once said to me when I was pregnant “Let’s make sure we always get him right at his first signs so that our baby will never learn to cry, ok?”)
• I would give him tummy time religiously

yeah… Then I had a baby. and all my expectations flew out the window. I had to change my list. and more importantly, I had to adjust to what best suited me and my family.

• my baby sleeps between me and Adam almost every night (and I’m still always embarrassed admitting that…) because that was the only way he would stay asleep when he was first born. swaddling? I know people swear by it but it just didn’t work for us
• I do wear my baby in a carrier but not religiously. though he does love it.
• he has drank formula on occasions when I can’t feed him (and I also hate admitting that…)
• hunger cues and crying? we tried. and haven’t failed completely. but in regards to never crying? we failed.  there are other things to cry about besides hunger it turns out and I’m still devastated when I hear him cry. I feel horrible when I don’t know how to help him… [literally I cry with him] but I have mastered the bounce technique that helps calm him down
• and tummy time is very forgetful to me. especially when all I can think about is sleep. I’m sure some die hards would tell me I’m ruining his developmental growth…

after going over my list of hopes and dreams of how I would be a perfect mother, I get discouraged at times because I feel like I failed. I guess I’m not a perfect mother.

but I try. and I try to make him happy. I try to keep him healthy {and alive}. which is important right? and I try to do the best for my family even if it’s not quite what all the specialists have said.

then I think of what my Aunt Shelley said to me last week when I went to visit her.

“You don’t have to explain to anyone what you do. You know you are doing the best you know how. And that’s all you have to say. You are doing your best.”

I may not let him cry himself to sleep or give him enough Tummy Time. and I may hold him too much and or not have set nap times.

but I’m doing my best. and that’s all I know how.

 

personality is eternal

Then:

A little after Then:

And Now:

 (is this not the funniest picture ever???)

The boy loves his hands.

{always}

 

heart melting

this was from about a month ago maybe… so he’s way chunkier now. but still super cute. enjoy!

Elijah talking to Adam

Meet Eli

 

Likes:

• eating
• sleeping
• Mommy
• Daddy
• his little bear
• his pacifier
• walking around
• seeing the world
• his bouncer
• talking
• his Mommy singing
• baths
• his bear rattle
• cuddling
• his Daddy bouncing him on his knee
• his hands {loves loves loves}
• the T.V. or any moving pictures
• his Bjorn
• his cousins/other little kids

Dislikes:

• getting dressed/undressed (the clothes over his head thing… freak out)
• sitting in one place for too long
• the sun
• the wind
• {sometimes} going to bed
• not being able to see his Mommy or Daddy
• not being able to see all around him
• Justin Bieber
• drums
• Mom playing the Wii while holding him in the Bjorn 

i don’t say it enough…

But I really {really} love my siblings.

Rhiannon: with her imepcable fashion sense and amazing creativity, she puts anyone to shame in my eyes when it comes to arts and crafts. I told my mom that I wished I could have just a sliver of her creativity and I would be happy. she has wonderful ideas and is so good at executing them. I have been jealous of her since I could talk for how cool she is.she’s the coolest ever. she is always there when I need her the most even if it is just for some good laughs and chocolate. she is one of the best big sisters anyone could ask for and I’m so glad she’s mine.

Dallin: you never fail to laugh out loud around him. his laugh is completely contagious and is one of my favorite sounds in the world. seriously. if you heard it you would love it too. he always makes me feel good and never makes me feel insignificant. even when I was little and he would pick on me [like a good big brother], he still made me feel like I was of great worth and I always knew he loved me. I couldn’t ask for a better brother.

Lauren: she is one of the kindest people you will ever meet. sure, we didn’t get along the best when we were little. but I was a pretty annoying little sister, any of them could attest to that. but I will never forget the day Lauren moved away. it was one of the saddest days of my life. she is the best listener and always makes me feel important. she doesn’t belittle me or make feel like my worries are stupid and silly. when I talk to her, I feel like she is right in the room with me putting her arm around me. I love joking with her and laughing with her. she does so much for me and I could never thank her enough. I only hope someday I will become as giving and selfless as she is. because honestly, I can’t think of a time that Lauren wouldn’t do anything for any one of us.

{and of course, I love their spouses too.}

What’s in a name?

If you remember my little poll that I had on the side of my blog, you could see that Elijah was not an option. But Eli was. And it didn’t win… but it was close.

But besides using all of you kind reader’s input on deciding our child’s name, there was a little more that went into it. And I love how we decided his name. And so I want to share it with you.

I loved the name Eli from the beginning. Adam said no. He said it reminded him of someone he knew named Eli who was annoying. So that seemed to end the argument. But I just felt like Eli was a good name for our baby.

Later on, me and Adam were talking about names {again} and he said, “I only like Eli if it’s short for Elijah.” I about gagged. I did not want to be a Bible named family. I mean I liked the names in the Bible and of course Eli is a name in there. But I felt that was more subtle than Elijah. I mean everyone knows Elijah!

Then Adam surprised me and said, “I want him to have someone to emulate. I don’t want to make up a name with no meaning and he doesn’t have anyone to look towards as a namesake.”

So we pulled out the Bible Dictionary and looked up Elijah. And it honestly took my breath away.

[Elijah means: Jehovah is my God]

His recorded words are few but forceful, and his deeds are explicit evidences of his strength of will, force of character, and personal courage. He was an example of solid faith in the Lord. His life closed dramatically; “there appeared a chariot of fire, . . . and Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven,” (2 Kgs. 2: 11-12) and thus was he translated.

At that time, I felt like Adam was right. Elijah was a wonderful person to name our baby after. But it still wasn’t set in stone… yet.

Then when our Elijah was born, we had such a hard time nailing down a name. I like Eli, Adam wasn’t sure, and the book of 100,000+ baby names was only making things more complicated.

The last night in the hospital, I was up most of the night holding my baby and looking at his little face. I kept saying the names we had narrowed down over and over again. And the only one that felt at all natural was Elijah.

Adam woke up the next morning and I told him how I felt. I told him how strong my feelings were toward the name Elijah and I wanted him to feel the same. I handed our little one over to him and he held him and rocked him for a few minutes while looking down at his face. Adam then looked up at me and said, “Yeah. That’s his name.”

So Elijah it was!

It was kind of hard getting used to it at first because I was calling him “baby” for three days. I second guessed myself every time I said his name aloud and doubted all the birth certificate paperwork.

But now when I look at him and see him smiling up at me, I know it was the right name to choose. He is my baby Eli and there is no doubt in my mind anymore. And all I can hope for is that he will someday emulate the prophet he was named after and know of his great worth. He is a miraculous blessing in our lives. And through him and my experiences these 3 short months, I have found my own personal courage and solid faith in the Lord.

On Motherhood: Part 3

Having a newborn is a lot harder than I thought. I am tired {most of the time}, I don’t always know what he wants and sometimes he refuses to be put down.

But I love it. I absolutely love it.

I love him. I love the sweet spirit he brings into our home. I love that he makes me want to be a better mother everyday. I love that he makes me want to do everything I can to draw close to my Heavenly Father and the Savior so I can teach him as he grows. I love that he makes me want to try my hardest to be worthy to be his mother {for eternity}.

At night I sing him Primary songs to try to get him to sleep. As I was singing the last line of “I Wonder When He Comes Again” the other night, I remembered my parents singing it to me when I was little. When I heard the words “I’m sure he’ll call his little ones to gather round his knee” I longed to be one of the little children he calls forward. That little child is now my own son that will be called to sit upon the Savior’s knee.

I then sang "Love Is Spoken Here" and couldn’t finish. It hit me that when my child sings that song in Primary, he would think of me. HIS MOTHER. Kneeling in family prayer and “hearing the words I whisper.” I want to be the best for him. I want him to know that I love him and I love the Lord.

I love my family. And I love being a mother. {FINALLY} being a mother! I know I can live all my family {forever}.

On Motherhood: Part 2

I have always wanted to be a mother. Ever since I was a little girl and would read to my cabbage patch dolls and play house with my friends. I would even dress up my cat in our old baby clothes and carry her around like a baby.

I always wanted to take care of a baby and nurture a choice spirit of our Heavenly Father. I wanted my own family. I took every opportunity I could get to babysit the kids in the neighborhood or take care of my little cousins. I thought of all the fun things I would do with my own children someday and how great it would be to be a mom.

When I first found out I was pregnant I have admit those were not the first thoughts I had. I thought of my schooling and my temporal goals. I thought I was a failure because I didn’t think I would graduate anymore after all my hard work (and loans…) In short, I was selfish. And I am ashamed that it was like that.

Then pregnancy happened. And pregnancy was {so hard.} And I thought even more of how crazy this is. I thought so many times that I wouldn’t make it. And I thought a baby would just be too much right now. But I knew the Lord had a bigger plan than my own.

And then my precious baby was born. And all those thoughts completely vanished. I never thought I could love someone so much! I wanted nothing more at that moment than to just be {Elijah’s mother.}

more to come…

 

On Motherhood: Part 1

Before I continue on after my two month hiatus, please watch this and enjoy. And know that I love my Heavenly Father, my Savior, my son and my husband.

More on this to come.

365 days of marital bliss

(this is late. I know. I’ve hardly had time to write out this post between naps and feedings. literally, as i was writing the first sentence the baby woke up. but my feelings are the same as they were last week)

on May 1st, 2009 I was sealed for time and all eternity my best friend. He is perfect for me in every way. He knows me inside and out. And I love him so much.

I love him for how well he can predict my every thought and action. Sometimes I guess it can get annoying not being  able to keep anything to myself… but it’s also pretty stinkin’ amazing to be with someone who knows you better than you know yourself. I am so so grateful for that. 

I love Adam for his sincerity and honestly.

I love him for his kindness and being quick to want to make me happy.

I love Adam for his example of dedication and hard work.

I love Adam for his testimony and his faith. I don’t remember a time he has ever doubted God or lost hope. He knows who is he and he knows where he is going and it is such a huge example to me.

I love him for always thinking about me and trying hard to take care of me. Even when he is studying hard for a test, he will make sure I still feel important and taken care of. He makes sure I know I am first in his life. And he in mine.

I love him for his love of others and to serve those in need.

I love Adam for giving me a beautiful and perfect baby boy. And for being an amazing father to him. It melts my heart every time I see Adam pick up his little boy and smile at him. He loves him so much. And I know Elijah will always know that, no matter what.

   

Thank you for the best year of my life! I can’t believe you chose me but I am so happy you did.

Here’s to eternal love.