heart *bursting*



our trip to California was much needed for us. 
for me, especially. 
i had been feeling really burnt out in the motherhood department. 
{okay, let's be honest. when am i not burnt out?} 
but seriously Adam's school schedule and Elijah's growing rebellious streak were taking its toll on me. 
add on a frustrating 12-hour road trip and needless to say i was not in the best mood when we first arrived. 

but after just the first day i already felt revived. 

to say Elijah had the time of his life in California is an understatement. 
how could he not? 
he had everything he could ever want: 
going outside to play 
a kitty cat 
{sneaking} candy whenever he could 
fun uncles 
and of course grandma & grandpa

Elijah was so happy it was contagious. i loved seeing him have fun, explore, and interact with family.
one night, as Adam and i were discussing the funny/cute things Eli had done that day, i asked Adam,
"Doesn't it just make you fall in love with him so much more when you see him so happy?"  

and that is genuinely how i felt. 

no matter how frustrated i was before, i felt like my heart grew exponentially watching Elijah play. 
it was that moment in parenthood where i finally understood why my mom and dad would always tell me that they didn't want a present for Christmas/their birthday, seeing us happy & healthy was more than enough.
i always thought that was a cop-out answer and that they really didn't mean it, they just were trying to make it easier cause maybe we couldn't afford the actual present they wanted. 

but now i got it. 
i finally understood. 
when Elijah is happy, i am truly happy. 
seeing him be so excited about life makes me love life more. 
he is my heart, the outside representation of it. and seeing him filled with joy literally fills my heart with joy too. 

so as long as i can make that little face light up, then i think i'm doing a pretty good job. 

10 comments:

Kassi said...

Happy baby = happy momma! ;)

Brittany T. said...

Oh how sweet! you're definitely doing a GREAT job mama! Elijah is so dang cute!! look at those lashes! I am glad you had a refreshing time in cali :)

Aimee said...

This is so sweet! He looks like he was having a blast, and how could he not with all those fun things. And so glad you could enjoy his happiness too!

Tygre Caley said...

What a sweet boy! (I'm visiting from Houtz House Party). Thanks for sharing your "typical day" story and being honest about it! It's so easy to compare mommyhood stories and be discouraged, so your honest is greatly appreciated! ;)

Tygre Caley said...

And glad you had fun in Cali! :)

Unknown said...

Awe! I think we all need those wake up calls every now & then. Just seeing our loved ones happy...realizing that it's all worth it. Thanks for the reminder & I'm so glad you had a blast in California.

Nicole said...

SO true. kids are the best...most of the time : )

nicole
nicoledschaak.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

There is nothing like seeing yourvkids excited and so happy. I completely agree. I just saw your post on Kellys page and I had to stop by. I loved how normal and real it made me feel :)

Alexis Kaye said...

thats so sweet :)

Unknown said...

I totally get this! There is probably nothing that makes me happier than seeing (actually seeing!!!) my kids happy. It is the best thing!

And I totally understand the question "When am I not feeling burnt out?" Glad I'm not the only one because every single day I feel sooooo tired! lol