throughout the course of a day, i can count at least 10 times that i (and Adam hopefully?) make compromises in my marriage.
- taking on the bed-making responsibility
- giving in to the dish-loading debate
- cooking hot dogs with our macaroni & cheese (i don't like it; Adam & Elijah love it, so in they go!)
- buying diet Dr. Pepper instead of regular cause Adam swears he's cutting out calories ;)
- watching one of Adam's favorite shows so that next time he'll watch mine
- budgeting & spending = lots of compromising!
- taking turns getting Elijah ready for bed. the struggle of our lives.
and lots more!
all of these seem like really small decisions {macaroni & cheese},
but this isn't even including all the bigger compromises that happen often.
like who is going to compromise their pride and apologize first during a fight,
or how we're going to make our two different parenting styles work together.
to be happy in a relationship takes compromise.
the other day as i was picking up the house, feeling kind of frustrated that i was the one cleaning again, i realized how much we both trade-off and adjust our expectations to meet a peaceful, middle ground.
there are so many things we could choose to fight about every day.
[as i'm sure most of you can relate to]
miscommunication,
household duties,
money,
family responsibilities,
work,
decisions about the future.....
all these things and more that we could choose to be stubborn about & never agree on.
but no love or joy comes from that.
to really show a true measure of love takes understanding & sacrifice.
compromise.
"take me by the hand let's compromise" -The Format
10 comments:
I like this. I feel like the best relationships are formed with people when you just aim to always give extra. If everyone gives a little extra, everyone stays happy :)
In a talk in our ward (the one before I was with you, in fact), the high priest said that it's silly that folks think husbands and wives should do things 50-50. He said this was an automatic way to fail. Each spouse needs to give 100% or everything will fall apart.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It's always nice to hear that other couples have the same little compromises we do. (Our thing with mac & cheese is hotdogs AND peas. I throw in peas to give it nutritional value (Clark dislikes peas) and Clark likes hot dogs because it relates to memories. :D)
I have been married 1 month and we are SO in the middle of learning to compromise and I know we'll always be compromising. It's nice to know that I married someone who is willing to compromise with me so that we can learn together and grow closer together.
Love this post!
Compromise is the hardest thing to learn in a marriage. I also like the fact that the word compromise is basically "co" "promise". Make promises together.
Xoxo
Megan
I love this! Such a good reminder for me, especially on hard days! And I love what Megan said, "co" "promise"! Wonderful!
I think I needed this reminder today! thank you so much!!!! :)
Ah yes! So true girl! Compromise is key!
Nathan and I have known compromise would be a key to long lasting happiness in our marriage for years now, but I don't feel like we really embraced the idea until a few months ago. We're still far from pros at it, but it put a lot of things into perspective and made us both see how neither one of us were getting what we wanted at times.
Great post, as always :)
Perfect! A quote I once heard discussed how we should spend 90% of our time serving our spouse and 10% on ourselves and our spouse the same. At the end of the day our needs are met, but so much sweeter by the one we love.
This is such a hard thing! Often I feel like I compromise more than my husband, but I realize thats a REALLY horrible way to look at things because then I become bitter and really, I am no better than him! I have to remind myself of this constantly! Compromising can be SO hard!
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